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[lastcomfort]

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it's okay, we have multiples often. this can still happen

[not_so_hollow]

[Orihime's reaction isn't surprising in the slightest, it's not the first time he has ever made her cry, frankly he is almost surprised that she manages to hold it together as long as she does. Ichigo is obviously never happy about it when he is the cause of her tears (or when she cries at all), but if there were ever a time for him to stew in his guilt over this dreadful ability he has a knack for, it is now. Even the way she laughs in what seems like relief just nails in the shitty feeling that only seems to be increasing in intensity.

Ichigo tries to be reassuring, with his voice and with the way he grips her hand in return, but the apology he has is stuck in his throat, just beneath the words he says.]

Not a ghost, no tricks, it's really me.

[Selfishly, and it could wind up being a weird thing he will also have to apologize for, Ichigo finds himself wanting that contact. It's that sense of comfort he stupidly needs, and maybe it's presumptuous of him to guess that she probably does as well? But he's making the assumption and acting on it, regardless of the consequences. He can’t help it, not after everything they’ve been through together, before the trial, during the trial and the really messed up after. Ichigo doesn’t have the strength to hug her like he wants to, and the lack of shirt thing might make that even weirder than the fact that he wants to at all, so he just settles on bringing his free hand over to touch her head, lightly brushing against the hair there. Any normal day, he wouldn’t even dream of doing this and he would be bright red just thinking about it at all, but… this isn’t a regular day and it’s too damn serious for him to be concerned about giving her the wrong impression.]

Inoue…. [Ichigo starts and stops there, not… even sure which thing he should say first, thank you or I'm sorry. The mix of gratitude and regret is really hard to sort through, to weigh which he feels more… But maybe. Maybe it’ll be better to approach it the way people do when they have both good news and bad news to deliver. Bad news first, so that it’s at least a little easier to swallow when it’s warmed a little with the good news?

Seems like as good a plan as any.]

I’m… I’m sorry.

[lastcomfort]

[ She has the confirmation she needs, but still hearing it from him makes her heart want to burst. It's over. It's over. People really do come back! There had been a worry that everything she'd read was wrong, that no matter how many times she re-read it she missed something crucial. Patience is the hardest thing when you miss someone, but she would spend all those days in worry all over again if it meant keeping him around. ]

I'm s-so happy...

[ And she is. Despite the tears, she's just so elated that he's back. Sickness isn't fun, but he can come back from that. If he can really come back from death, he can come back from anything.

The hand on her hair is new, but she's not going to complain at all. For a second it makes a sob just a little more intense before she feels like she's gotten the worst out of it. When he says her name, she looks up, feeling more hopeful than she has in days. She reluctantly let's go of his hand with one of hers so she can wipe the tears from her eyes. She's all ears.

But she already doesn't like what she hears. Her expression falls just a tad as she looks up at Ichigo and she shakes her head. ]

W...why? There's nothing you need to apologize for. You're here. You came back to us. That's all that matters.

[not_so_hollow]

[Hearing something like that should make him smile, but it just. Doesn't. Not with the way she seems to cry harder when he touches her head. Ichigo only seems to frown harder as he watches her, watches the way she straightens out and wipes her tears away.

And then she asks him why, and Ichigo reels a little bit, kind of taken aback by it. He shouldn't be surprised, Orihime is eerily good at finding the positive in any bad situation, but it's still something that catches him off guard right now.

The look is wiped away and replaced with a very serious one in an instant though. His hand never moves from her head as he speaks, and he squeezes the one still holding his gently as if to emphasize the emotions behind his words. It's insistent, the way he addresses it, almost fierce.]

That's... that's not all that matters, though! I know that you're always gonna try to see the positive or whatever, and that you try not to let things bother you but--[A shit, Ichigo has to yank his hand away from her head so that he can cough into his arm for a moment. Once the fit passes, he continues as if nothing just happened at all, though his voice definitely sounds quite a bit more scratchy.] I-I wouldn't take back what I did, I meant that in that trial, but I'm still gonna regret that you had to watch what got me there in the first place, and. And that you had to watch me die... again. You shouldn't have to endure that, Inoue, and I went and made you do it again. So... yeah, I'm gonna apologize, and I'm also gonna promise to do my best to not ever let it happen again. I don't... [Ichigo pauses, glancing away from her with that same hard frown.] I don't like it when you cry, and especially not over me.

[lastcomfort]

[ Orihime sucks in her lips as Ichigo speaks, feeling her heart clench in on itself as she swallows down her own insecurities. He's not wrong--there's a lot that matters, but she doesn't want him to worry about it. Because, at the end of the day, that he returned is what is most important. Ichigo always comes back. He always bounces back. He'll recover from this, too, and he'll be even stronger for it.

But she listens to each word, considering them carefully. Because these are his feelings and his fears and they deserve the attention and acknowledgment he's asking for. ]

Kurosaki-kun...

[ She breathes out his name finally. ]

Please don't blame yourself...you didn't make me do anything. I-I chose to be there.

[ She straightens a little, kneeling a little taller as if that will add weight to her own statement. ]

When I saw Monokuma announce your trial, I volunteered to be on that jury. Even before I knew what you were being accused of, I knew it couldn't be true. Kurosaki-kun isn't that kind of person and you proved that.

[ Orihime shakes her head, squeezing his hand back just a little. ]

...It bothered me a lot. It still bothers me. But I would rather it bother me and try to have stopped it than to have not taken that risk at all. It wouldn't have been fair for you to face that alone.

[ The sincerity in her voice and in her face should say just as much as her words alone. She shakes her head again, feeling new wetness form at the corner of her eyes. ]

I-I'm sorry that it wasn't enough...

[ She quickly starts to wipe away the building tears. ]

S-Sorry! I'm trying not to--

[not_so_hollow]

[Dammit, he. Went about that all wrong. First thing's first.

The hand he'd had on the top of her head is returning center between them, so that he can brush some of those tears away himself with a thumb. He looks sad, watching her, but he's forcing up a smile anyway, shaking his head.]

No, don't... I didn't. Mean to imply that I don't want you to cry if that's how you feel. I just [A sigh as he draws his hand back and sets it down in his lap. That sad excuse for a reassuring smile is dropping back down again, too.] Have a knack for making you do it, I guess, and that sucks. That's what 'm sorry for.

[Ichigo goes silent for a long moment, trying to come up with the wording for how to address what she's just said about the trial.] I don't want you to be sorry for that, either. They say it's the thought that counts and while it's not usually applied to somethin' like this, it does. I was gonna go down for what I did no matter what, Inoue, but having you fight, for me like that was... [The faint smile curling up this time is actually genuine, and Ichigo sort of absently pulls at a loose thread in the comforter he's sitting on.] ...it was comforting. And kinda awesome, I've never really... seen you get so. I dunno, fierce, or whatever. I'm really grateful, that you tried so hard. More than you could ever know. It's the rest that I regret.